I miss being pregnant

Don't get me wrong, I love my baby more and more every day, but being pregnant sure did have its perks. And, now that I'm actually with my baby, rather than "with" baby, I realize how cushy the 9 months were.

1. Strangers love pregnant women. Everywhere I went, people would smile at me. Old women would coo, young women would grin and ask when I was due, and even men would light up at the sight of a pregnant chick (my theory here is that they equate pregnant women with sex and that gets them excited). Everyone was eager to help - open the door, carry groceries, hold the elevator, give me their spot in line, etc. Now-a-days, these same strangers avert their eyes as soon as they see the stroller approach. They pretend not to see me while pushing "close door" as fast as possible in the elevator before I can disturb their sacred space, they give dirty looks if my baby dares make a peep in public, and they pray I don't join them on an airplane.

2. The 3 c's - Cake, Chocolate, Cannoli's. (Cannoli's are high in calcium which is good for pregnant women, plus, the bigger my belly got, the skinnier my legs looked. Incredible.)

3. I couldn't shave my legs. Too much effort. (Ok, let's be honest, it's still too much effort.)

4. I couldn't have sex. Too much effort. (See #3)

5. Expectant mother parking. I loved it at the time, but this is such a joke. Do retail establishments believe it's harder for a woman to get to their front door carrying around an extra 10lbs in her gut or for a woman carrying a stroller, carseat, diaperbag, and baby?


Here's the one thing I don't miss - the hemmorhoids. Sorry people. I didn't get a push present. I got a 9 months of tushie torture present. Thanks honey.